Not wanting to be freeDuring the training, to gain one-pointedness of mind is difficult, but if we can have a little bit of peace, it is considered very meritorious and wholesome as our mind is usually restless. We understand its real nature when we observe that it is constantly wandering. During the sitting, the mind is not still and is full of thoughts. So in looking at how the mind works, we can see that Nibbana is a very long way away.
Nibbana is far away because the mind refuses to be free and still. Therefore we must make a real effort. To free and still our mind, we must meditate frequently until the mind gets used to the training. The mind is simultaneously pulled in two opposite directions. On the one hand, Dhamma will push the mind towards peace. On the other, the mundane will pull it towards restless thoughts, full of turmoil, according to whatever it wants to create.
The mundane pulls the mind and creates craving: to carry more burden, to desire to obtain various things, to become people of different status, to have this and that, to travel here and there, to eat this, to eat that, to speak about different subjects. Craving will pull our heart and we will refuse to stop thinking. Thoughts will keep on flowing, one after another.
The Buddha said, "Samudaya is craving which is never fulfilled. Only The Path, which is knowing one's own mind, which is being aware of craving, will end Suffering." If Suffering is not eliminated, we will give in to our emotions ... and this is Samudaya. If we are quick enough to follow our own mind, it will be the Path of Truth which purifies thoughts, Anusaya and defilements which are buried deep in our emotional nature. This can be called a momentary Nirodha (Extinction of Suffering).
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